It's Poisoned

Well, I am dead. I was sitting, watching my son fight Laertes, and he was winning. Then the minute I get up to wipe the sweat from his brow and take a drink in his honor something bad happens;I get poisoned and die. How unfair is that? I mean really, I did not do anything and I die. On the flip side though I get to be with my dear husband Hamlet now. I guess there is one positive other positive to be taken from this too, I do not have to go through anymore pain and heartache. That is a good thing, right? Either way what's done is done and I am dead.

I Had Hoped You Would Be My Daughter-In-Law

It was cold and dreary as we traveled to the grave today to lay Ophelia to rest. Laertes was very upset that the priest would not say any last words for his sister. He made such a specticle of himself and I felt terrible for him but I did not know what I could do to help the poor boy, but maybe he just needed to grieve. Then out of no where Hamlet walks up with Horatio and he and Laertes about have it out right then and there. Of course Claudius had it broken up, but Hamlet was very heart broken. He really did love Ophelia whether anyone else thought so or not. I don't know how much more I can take though. I know things are suppose to get worse before they get better but this is ridiculous, you know?

This Has to be the Last Straw..............Right?

My son asked me not to speak of anything to Claudius other than what he told me to and that is exactly what I did. At that point I did not think things could get anyworse and sure enough they do. Following the death of Polonius, Opehlia just could not help he and she went crazy, she simply lost it. I tried to comfort her, but I feared to she was to far gone for anyone to help her. And was I ever right. I just went dow to the river to find her floating in the water, dead. It seemed that she had escaped somehow and had either drowned herself or had gotten tangled up in her cloting and drowned.Either way, the site just broke my heart and Hamlet has been sent away and does not know of her death, if he did I fear it would break his heart. I loved her like I a daughter and now she is gone. Why does it seem like everyone I am close to is dying, I am beginning to feel like it is me. But either way I can not take anymore. My hope is that nothing else happens but we will see.

What Have I Done...............

OMG, I can not believe what just happened. All I want to do now is curl up somewhere and cry. I had no idea that I had hurt my son so much. Let me explain what happend so you can understand. I was sitting in my room waiting on him to come talk. He storms into my room in a way and begins to raise his voice at me. Telling me that I had done his father wrong by marrying Claudius and that I did not really love Claudius at all. Then when I thought he as calming down, he began to carry on a conversation with the air. I did not see anything but he said it was the ghost of his father. I thought he had went mad. Then I began to calmly and rationaly talk to me and it broke my heart and I no longer wonder what I had done to make him angry and make myself angry; I felt sadness, regret, and remorse because I realized what I had done and it was not good. So, now we sat there looking on at the lifeless body of Polonius because Hamlet killed him when he heard someone lerking behind the curtain. I told him that I would not tell a soul of what he had said. I now feel closer to my son than I ever thought I could. I just hope everything turns out ok.

Passing the Time

Well, as long as I am sitting her I figured I might as well do something constructive to get my mind off of my son, so I decided to do a little sewing. It is not much but it is something, I do not have much else to do under the circumstances. I could plan a party, but their is not anything to celebrate, I could go to sleep, but until Hamlet comes that will never happen, or I could do what I am doing blogging and sewing. However, speaking of parties, I could plan a Halloween party; yeah that is a good idea. I will need food ideas, entertainment ideas, invitations, a costume, and the list just keeps going. I better get started now before it is too late. Halloween is closing in very quickly.

Still Waiting..................

I have been sitting here for what seems like an eternity and Hamlet still has not come. Maybe he is hiding from something; what if, he is hiding from me. No, No, I can not bear to think that my own son what run and keep something from his mother, it is not possible. Maybe I am letting my mind get the best of me, maybe I have nothing to be concerned about, maybe.............. Oh I just don't know what to think. I know what I will do though no matter what he says I will try and keep an open mind and maybe if I do some answers will be revealed, I hope.


Mood: Concerned

As If Things Could Not Possibly Get Any Worse

Well I still had a small amount of hope left but I fear all of that is now gone too. Tonight my son really showed that he has lost his mind. He embarrassed Ophelia, myself, Claudius, and especially himself. I don't know what I am going to do with him. If he does not change soon drastic measures will have to be taken. I don't know what those will be yet but something will be done. He made it known tonight that he did not agree with my marrying his uncle, and that he did not think I loved his father at all. I broadcast this across the entire assembly, and not only that suggested that poor Ophelia had had relations with him in front of God and everybody. Then to take the cake the play that was presented alluded that I had loved my husband and proclaimed my love to him and that while sleeping in the garden he was poisoned by someone who then remarried his wife. To me that is a little strange, maybe a coincidence, but who knows if it just happened to be a close storyline to my life minus my husbands death. I am beginning to wonder though whether or not I made the right decision marrying Claudius; I sure hope so. But I must go and speak to my son and find out what is going on in his mind.

What Am I Going To Do

Well, I thought that maybe if I gave Hamlet some time to himself that things would get better, but they aren't. He is just getting worse. I am very concerned because he is starting to act crazy. He is not making any sense most of the time and I don't know what to do. My husbands friend Polonius seems to think that he is in love with his daughter Ophelia and that he is angry because she has not spoken to him. They are planning to set a trap using Ophelia as bait to find out if he loves her or not. I hope that this is what is wrong but if it isn't I don't know what I am going to do. If it isn't I hope that we can find out what is and try and help him though. Well I am going to go and try and care for Hamlet and think about what is going on.

What a day, no not even a day, what a month. In a months time my husband has died and I have remarried. I can't say that I am not sad because I am and I do miss him but you can not dwell on things forever, you have to move on. I guess that sounds bad on my part and that I did not love him but I did, but this oppurtunity came up which allowed me to still be queen and who could pass that up.
So, anyway, I married Claudius, my brother-in-law, because he was voted in by the people to be king and he asked me to marry him. Hamlet is not happy about the matter but what can you do, he wants to mourn and I am trying to move on with my life. You can not please everyone. But anyway I must get off of here and go and talk to my husband. Tomorrow is always a new day.